Subject.

What to say... Okay so last week a few interesting things happened.

Zone Conference. My first one and it was nice to get together with all the missionaries in the neighboring zones of whom I know like zero people... I enjoy getting together with the other missionaries because one, it is a chance to learn how other people do missionary work, and two, because it beats biking endlessly with no success in Kitarokko. As great as it all is to talk about the most successful ways to do missionary work and how to really help your investigators, it doesn`t make a difference when you can`t talk to them! I set a goal to be fluent by six months (Christmas Day) and I am realizing how impossible that goal is with this ridiculous language. I still want to reach it, but my problem is I haven`t had an experience yet where I`ve been surprised with my Japanese, or that I have felt like things have gotten easier, I just feel like I will never learn this language. I try really hard, I do everything people tell me to to more effectively learn and remember what I learn, and comprehend, but I just feel like the only reason that my mission is two years long is because I will be so helpless with this language for the first 18 months or however long it takes me to master this.

So I haven`t had a necessarily bad week, but I just don`t feel all that great. I was able to celebrate thanksgiving complete with pie, potatoes, stuffing, the works and it was delicious. (thank you for the package I finally got it on Wednesday, just in time, and I also got the dictionary and the christmas advent calendar package thank you for being amazing family!) but I just don`t really feel good. I feel like I am working hard, and doing what I am supposed to do for the right reasons, but basically I just am feeling down. I feel like the Holidays are just going to be the worst time ever, thanksgiving was incredibly bittersweet, and I don`t even want to think about Christmas, I try to listen to christmas music to boost my spirits sometimes and then it just makes me think of home and AHHH!!! anyway, I hope all is well and it sounds like y`all had a great thanksgiving which is great.

We aren`t really teaching many people here, and the only people that will meet with us are people who are super old investigators who don`t progress well if at all, or mentally ill people. Anyone who is decently smart it seems, unless they know English, doesn`t want to waste their valuable time with two americans trying to talk to them about God and Christ who they don`t care about and have gotten along fine without for thousands of years. As junior companion my `responsibility` is new investigators and of course we struggle to find anyone who will meet with us for the sake of religion and not just because we`re Americans. Then our zone leader gives me a call being like well why don`t you have any new investigators in your area the past two weeks, and I want to ask him, if two japanese guys came to your door and in awful english asked if they could meet with you and discuss Buddhism would you listen to them for more than 5 minutes? That is really how people see us I feel and I know I shouldn`t be cynical or negative but I just get frustrated as you can imagine.

I don`t mean to rant, but this week has been hard. I love you all and I will try and share more happy, fun news about this place I now have to call home and the people here. I love and miss you all! (Rebecca I am writing you a letter about your current situation.)

Mom, I would love to write a letter to all my pals and buds on missions, but I don`t even have enough time to write my family! so I will see what I can do, but email time is very short! People like to imagine that you have all this time to write letters, but really I have about 2-3 hours to email and write everyone that emails and writes me because I have to do things like Study and Shop and Clean the apartment on P-Day which is only about 6 hours long. I would LOVE to write every member of our family and all my friends every week, but there isn`t time.

Love,

Jonathan, Elder Pace